Konglish and Beyond

Poor advertising strategy.

When cutesy gets creepy.

I sort of feel like we should've chosen another brand of gym clothes to give to our students.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing? I'm not sure.

Oh, Outkast, you have changed the way we speak forever (ever).

I want to relive that stress!! Sign me up!!

I can't even come up with a good caption for this one. What the heck kind of shirt is this??

Obscure writing on the back of a calendar I bought. I had no idea that was how the temperature was controlled...

Is this what I think it is??

It sure is. Nothing says class like a toothbrush holder shaped like feces.

I'm A-OK

View of Seoul from the Seoul Tower

I'm sure most of you have heard about the bombings here in South Korea on Tuesday, and I want to try to put your mind at ease as much I can.

First, although this was the first time North Korea killed civilians in an attack, most sources I've read or spoken to agree that this is "just another stunt" by the North. I'll admit, it's a bit unnerving to live in a country where you see plumes of smoke on TV one day, and it's business as usual the next. My South Korean friends told me they're just used to it. I think that's incredibly sad to have to be "used to" bombings and threats on a regular basis.

The good news is that China isn't supporting their latest scare tactic, although they're not really taking a stand against them, and the North seems to be worried that their only source of outside support right now is coming from China, which is why they're demanding money from Seoul and Washington.

Seoul and Washington's take on the matter is called "strategic patience" which I take to mean that they'll let the North throw little fits, without doing much in retaliation. By continuing to wait it out and not give aid, they're hoping to starve out and further isolate the North Koreans, which I don't totally agree with. Many North Koreans are already starving to death and are trapped under a bloody regime of terror. Also, I feel that letting them get to a point of sheer desperation isn't the best idea. Then again, I don't want Seoul and Washington to retaliate on a full-blown war level, so I guess it's a good thing I'm not making the decisions in this matter. The cost for Seoul would be devastating, while the North seems to view civilian and military casualties as cheap and utterly expendable.

To put your mind at ease, I want to assure you that I'm not in any danger here and the US embassy (which I am registered with, rest assured) hasn't issued any warnings or evacuations.

I think if it did come to evacuations, I would be absolutely devastated to leave my children behind. But it hasn't come to that, and I'm confident that it won't, so for now I'll continue to teach and explore and grow.

Thank you for all your emails of concern and your prayers - they mean a lot!

NoKo/SoKo

This is supposed to make me feel safe...?

Since I've been here, I've heard South Koreans talk about North Korea exactly two times. The first time, I asked one of my Korean friends about North Korea, to which she basically shrugged off my question by asking me why I wanted to know anything about North Korea. It was like North Korea was on a different planet.

The second time, a man randomly decided to tell me a "funny story" about a time when a North Korean saw someone opening a can of soda and ran for cover, thinking it was a grenade. This story didn't make me laugh, it made me sad. What must it be like to live in a world where all you know is seen through war-tinted glasses? To be so fearful and vigilant that a soda can makes you run for your life?

In South Korea, there is rarely mention of our northern neighbors... but there are tiny traces of their existence here and there. This picture is from the subway system in Seoul. There are tall glass cabinets through the subway stations that hold little brown sacks with bright orange safety masks in case of an attack. I'm not sure what is more alarming; the fact that there may be an attack, the fact that you're supposed to literally tie the bright orange mask around your neck, or the fact that there are about twenty sacks per station... and millions of commuters every day.

I'm planning a trip to the DMZ with some of my friends, so I'm sure I'll have some more insights on the NoKo/SoKo thing afterwards. I'll keep you posted. Until then, be thankful that you don't have to dive for cover when someone opens a Coke.

Note: I am perfectly safe here and not in danger. This post is not meant to alarm you, mom.

Welcome to Korea: Squeeze On In!

A Relatively Uncrowded Ride on the Subway

The motto of South Korea is, roughly translated, Benefit All Mankind. This seems like a fitting statement considering the entirety of mankind seems to be living shoulder-to-shoulder within SoKo's narrow borders. Not exactly sure what the benefit part of the motto could mean... perhaps safety in numbers?

Since moving here, I've learned that less than 2% of the entire population of South Korea consists of foreigners. Coming from the melting pot of the US, these numbers surprised me. At first I thought this was due to SoKo's stringent immigration requirements or other red tape issues. Now I'm beginning to think it's simply that more people won't fit. Everywhere you go, any time of day or night, there are people. Lots of them.

I've tried running on my neighborhood track at various times to avoid the throngs of walkers... but no luck. Whether it's 5 am or 11 pm, the experience resembles something like a Walk-a-Thon. Grocery store? Every day is like the day before Thanksgiving, minus the turkey.

There are no town homes or free-standing houses here. Everyone lives in giant towers of apartments. Hotels, restaurants, shops and clinics aren't their own entities, either. They're all tucked into large skyscrapers, with different floors for every type of business. It's all very efficient; packed in nice and tight, just like the citizens.

I still haven't gotten used to the crowds. I still get annoyed when Korean people slam into me and act like nothing happened, or step on my feet and remain oblivious. This is just a regular part of their lives and I'm trying to get accustomed to it. I have a feeling this is going to be the hardest part about transitioning to my SoKo life.